After Marna walked out of the meeting with the superintendent, everything seemed so surreal to her. As she drove, her head spun. She didn't know which way to turn or who she could talk to. At this point, they had only told a few family members and a few close friends; they all had their advice and opinion on what they should do. The suggestions ranged from teaching Beckham different kinds of self-defense, to pressing charges, to suing "Joe's" parents, the teacher, the principle, the district; you name it, it was brought up. Marna kept thinking she needed to talk to someone; someone who would be logical and not emotional. Someone who knew what they were talking about, that would listen to her and could give her some sound advice. She had never been involved nor had ever personally known anyone who had ever dealt with bullying this extreme. She didn't have a clue on which direction to take the situation. They weren't sure if they were going to take legal action or not, so they didn't want to call an attorney and be persuaded to go that direction. For the first time in her life, Marna didn't know what to do. She was dying inside; she truly felt helpless. The only thing she knew, was that she had to make sure Beckham would be okay. She needed to do everything in her power to make sure Beckham knew he was protected and to make sure that he could heal properly.
She did not want to do anything that might harm Beckham or prevent him from healing down the road. She wanted her happy, loving, sweet, confident little boy back and Beckham needed to find himself again. This is Beckham's life! She needed to make sure she wasn't an emotional roller coaster; she couldn't just react and fly off the seat of her pants. She knew everything she did, everything she said, would effect Beckham and his recovery. She had to make sure that she kept a level head. At the same time, she had to make sure Beckham knew and felt that his parents were doing everything they could to protect him, help him feel safe, help him feel peace, and to make sure he felt justice had been carried out with his attackers through proper punishment. Marna did not know who to turn to for advice. She really did not know what she was going to do.
Marna found herself pulling up to Beckham's best friend's house. Beckham had gone there after school to play. She just wanted to see him and give him a hug. After she gave Beckham a hug, he let her know he wasn't quite ready to go home yet and asked if he could play a little longer. Both mothers agreed to this. Since it was close to dinnertime, Marna just stayed and talked to other mom, while she made dinner. The friend's mom was aware of what was going on, because Beckham and her son were in the same class. It wasn't until Marna had this conversation that she realized her father was a local judge. They ended up talking for quite a while. Everything the other mom said made sense. Marna finally felt like she could take a deep breath and move forward. She knew that she needed Beckham and others to know that what had been happening to Beckham was not okay; that hurting others is not okay. She needed to do everything she could to make sure this message got across without anyone else getting hurt and she needed to make sure it was okay with Beckham.
Sunday, June 9, 2013
Monday, June 3, 2013
The Superintendent Meeting
Marna called the superintendent's office and talked to his secretary and explained to her what had been going on. The secretary was very concerned and made an appointment for Marna to sit down with the superintendent and the assistant superintendent; the assistant superintendent is over the anti-bully program.
The appointment was made for the very next day. As soon as Marna went into the meeting, they told her that as soon as they heard what had been happening they called the principal to verify everything. The superintendent said that what has been going on is not okay and her son should feel safe at school. They said they were going to hire somebody to make sure that Beckham is never touched again. They wanted to make sure that he was supervised before, during, and after lunch as well as at all recesses. They said they were also going to have a volunteer sit in class with him the remainder of the year to make sure he does not get bullied anymore. They wanted to make sure that Beckham knew school was a safe place to go and that what had been happening to him was absolutely not acceptable. At one point during the meeting the superintendent had to take a phone call. After it ended, it was revealed to Marna that there are 50 bullying incidences that happen in a week. She was shocked to hear this and concluded that something in the system needs to be changed.
The assistant superintendent continued to meet with Marna, because the superintendent had another meeting to attend. She was very please with the way the meeting had turned out. She felt like somebody finally took the situation seriously and that someone really cared. Now she just needed to wait and see if everything would be fulfilled the way she was told it would be.
She was also still concerned with the lack of punishment up to this point and wanted to make sure that this was addressed. She felt that if it wasn't addressed, it would just continue to happen over and over and over. She needed to make sure that everybody knew this was serious, that it was not a first-time offense, that it was not okay, and that she would not allow it to happen again. She was heartbroken that it took her going this far for the principal to realize how serious the situation really was. She meant business. Not just for her child, but for all the other children that this has and is happening to.
After meeting with superintendent and assistant superintendent, Marna felt more confused than ever. Why did it only take one phone call to the superintendent's office before someone took some serious action? She hadn't even spoken to the superintendent, she had only spoken to the secretary. The superintendent took the information from the secretary, called the principal to verify the situation, and felt he needed to hire someone to make Beckham safe at school. Why didn't the principal feel inclined to do anything more then issue two recess suspensions as punishment to the bully? Marna hadn't even made it into the superintendent's office and he already had a plan set up.
The appointment was made for the very next day. As soon as Marna went into the meeting, they told her that as soon as they heard what had been happening they called the principal to verify everything. The superintendent said that what has been going on is not okay and her son should feel safe at school. They said they were going to hire somebody to make sure that Beckham is never touched again. They wanted to make sure that he was supervised before, during, and after lunch as well as at all recesses. They said they were also going to have a volunteer sit in class with him the remainder of the year to make sure he does not get bullied anymore. They wanted to make sure that Beckham knew school was a safe place to go and that what had been happening to him was absolutely not acceptable. At one point during the meeting the superintendent had to take a phone call. After it ended, it was revealed to Marna that there are 50 bullying incidences that happen in a week. She was shocked to hear this and concluded that something in the system needs to be changed.
The assistant superintendent continued to meet with Marna, because the superintendent had another meeting to attend. She was very please with the way the meeting had turned out. She felt like somebody finally took the situation seriously and that someone really cared. Now she just needed to wait and see if everything would be fulfilled the way she was told it would be.
She was also still concerned with the lack of punishment up to this point and wanted to make sure that this was addressed. She felt that if it wasn't addressed, it would just continue to happen over and over and over. She needed to make sure that everybody knew this was serious, that it was not a first-time offense, that it was not okay, and that she would not allow it to happen again. She was heartbroken that it took her going this far for the principal to realize how serious the situation really was. She meant business. Not just for her child, but for all the other children that this has and is happening to.
After meeting with superintendent and assistant superintendent, Marna felt more confused than ever. Why did it only take one phone call to the superintendent's office before someone took some serious action? She hadn't even spoken to the superintendent, she had only spoken to the secretary. The superintendent took the information from the secretary, called the principal to verify the situation, and felt he needed to hire someone to make Beckham safe at school. Why didn't the principal feel inclined to do anything more then issue two recess suspensions as punishment to the bully? Marna hadn't even made it into the superintendent's office and he already had a plan set up.
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